The Carver is back on Nip/Tuck. About time.

Rolling

Thanksgiving was delicious. Except that upon parking on a lovely San Francisco hill, my car jumped back, hit the car behind me which caused that car's brake to disengage, making it propel backwards in a semi-circle, jumping the curb and driving itself across the street to finally come to a lovely, um, stop against another car on the other side.

The best part was all the kind area residents stopping to say "Quite a way to start Thanksgiving."

Ha ha ho.

I drive my car once I week to move it for the weekly street cleaning. That is all. And I take it grocery shopping this one time... Surprisingly, the damage was minimal. And no bystanders (there was an extended family standing at the corner) were killed. Car number 3 is kind enough to not pursue it any further. Luckily it was just a dent against the door. His car was old already so he didn't seem very concerned. Plus he was a nice man. Car number 2 seems to want to pursue this. The damage was a few scratches to his bumper and a dented light but he wants to get a quote.

Can someone steal my car and rid me of it? My car company won't allow me to break my lease. Unless of course I pay a penalty equivalent to the remaining payments. (There are 13 months left on the lease).

I should move to Arkansas just to have a reason to have the car. Or better yet, New Jersey.

Friends of mine

I'm walking to the train to get to work (already late). I see a cracked out homeless lady walking to me, swerving madly like a drunk driver behind a car. So I swerve in the other direction to avoid the crash. Oh but wait, I see her scratch her greasy head, inspect her fingers and dash towards me, arm outstretched, with a slurred "Excuse me sir" as she purposely wipes her fingers on my arm and walks away.

Hello, caller.

I was recently flipping through the channels. I flip fast and even faster through those middle Local access, Home shopping channels. But for some reason I stopped and landed on QVC. The well-kept host with her perfect Texas Beauty Queen hair and florescent smile was selling some lovely necklaces. They were made of small silver hoops interlocking to form the spectacle displayed on a mannequin neck. The Beauty Queen was speaking about the beauty of the necklace with a caller who recently purchased one. You see, the caller liked it so much she was about to buy another (they came in three different sizes). The caller sounded delicate. Alone.

The host propped the necklace in front of different colored cloths to demonstrate how well it complemented any color (especially blue, the caller's favorite). As the host displayed the shiny necklace around her perfectly manicured nails, she asked who this necklace was for. The caller said it was for herself.

"Thanks for loving yourself," beamed the host, condescendingly.

Immediately, sadness emanated from the screen. The fake set, the fake jewelry, the fake host.

"Nobody else does–" replied the caller.

The statement, registering before the caller finished prompted the host to ignore it. But more than that. Almost interjecting. As if embarrassed or annoyed. This caller will not ruin my show. On she went dismissing life going on around her and focused back on the beautifully fake necklace being sold for $29.99 plus S&H.

Thanks for calling. Click

Toyota Pulls Ads From FX's Nip/Tuck

According to Mediaweek, Toyota, along with other sponsors, have pulled their ads from Nip/Tuck. Too much sex they say. Hello, it's cable TV. And have they seen The Real World? There's some real freaky deaky going on there.

On a slightly different note, what happened to The Carver on Nip/Tuck? I don't care about the damn new after surgery spa...where's the Carver?

To the Brazilians, who don't speak Brazilian

I spent my weekend at work my internship doing something that should have taken just a few hours. But people can't seem to make up their minds so it took all weekend.

I did get to go out with friends on Friday night. Dinner was delicious at a Chinese place on Polk Street. Probably the best Chinese I've had. I can't say the same for the few Bud Lights I had after – I may have to give it up. But the company was amazing. The Brazilians, whom I met in school, have left and gone back to the motherland. They've become some of my favorite people and the few friends I had in San Francisco. Unless of course you count itchy crotch boy and one of the blonde Trifecta from school. Cause I don't.

I'm sad. But hopeful I hear from them again.
"Whatever. Chill out dude."

Links

I've added a links section to other blogs!

I hate Makras Real Estate, 1193 Church Street, in San Francisco.

They're rude, unhappy people. I went to pick up keys for the new front door. There are two of us in the apartment but they would only give me one key. They checked my ID and verified my identity in their computer system. Saw that there are two of us in the apartment but refused to give both keys for security purposes. Like I'm going to take the second key to my apartment and give it to the random guy on the corner who makes non-stop moaning sounds. I'd love him dropping by unexpectedly.
Regardless of their policies, they were assho*** about the whole thing. Never do business with these people.

Post-its

I'm 25 years old. I'm well educated. I have a nifty little degree and after an additional two years, a decent creative portfolio. (Perfect for working in a creative ad agency). But apparently, I'm a complete idiot. You see, the fact that I did go to school and oh, I don't know, I'm a human and not a rock, is not enough for simple instructions.

The far superior non-rocks who work here seem to disagree. I love post-its. They're amazing. You can put 23,000 of them in a book and give one simple instruction and somehow, magically, have that instruction apply to every post-it.

But since I am a dumb rock, I really don't understand that the little yellow sticky tab on a page means I should scan that page. I thought it meant scan the page that's four away. I'm so glad someone sat me down and showed me the 28 different pages with post-its and one by one told me which ones to scan.